10.10.13

Was so close to overdosing last night. I was so drunk, but it got to the point where I felt so lonely and sad. You know like the last stages of a night out when you get back home. I feel so lonely and all I wanted was sex or for a guy to be in my bed and I don't know why. I just felt so completely alone and when your drunk, feeling like that is horrible. I just want to get rid of this feeling. I feel like I'm just all over the place yet feel as though I don't know who to turn to. My flat mates don't know anything about the other side of me and I can't just explode it onto them because I don't what that to happen. I wish this was all so easy yet all I feel is loneliness and depression and, oh I don't know! Fucking hell.