27.09.13

I've slept with two guys in 4 days. I feel horrible. One because I didn't use any protection, but secondly because the feelings and memories came flooding back. I felt utterly ashamed of myself, felt so dirty. Felt like I shouldn't be touched, like I didn't deserve to be loved. I felt, oh I don't know. Things are happening too fast. I just want to all to be so fucking easy you know. I knew that my problems would follow me no where I go. Who was I to believe that because I'm not living in the same place as where it all happened it would disappear? I'm such a joke.