06.09.13

I don't see my bulimia as a problem anymore. Yes, I still do it but it doesn't feel like its something that people should worry about. Its something so normal to me now, its a part of me. Even though I've been diagnosed with it, it doesn't feel like a diagnosis; it just feels like its a part of my personality. Maybe because I don't see it as a problem that's why no one else see's it as a big deal and maybe that's why no one has done anything to stop it (mental health professionals). You see, because I'm not severely underweight or that I've only done minor damages to my body, no one else sees it as a problem or that it doesn't need to be addressed. Its like it should be just passed off as something, like I'm going through a 'phase'. And if it is a phase, nearly 4 years is a long time to have one. I don't know, I just sometimes feel that bulimia is lower on the hierarchy of eating disorders. Obviously, having an eating disorder is something which people shouldn't hide away from, but every time I've seen a mental health professional, it just feels as though it isn't anything and because I don't suffer from anorexia its like nothing should happen and I should just be discharged and to deal with it on my own. Fuck sake, I'm getting myself in a right old hissy fit now just thinking about it; fuck this shit.