Things have been difficult recently and I apologize for a really late response or post. Like I've just said, things have been difficult and slightly chaotic. I had a chat with my university tutor who was lovely. As he is a mental health nurse instead, he understood why I may be finding things difficult and suggested that I need to follow what I feel is right. We had a conversation just less than a month ago. I'm currently on placement at CAMHS or CYPS as its called up here which is slightly difficult because I was in this service from where I used to live from the ages of 15 to 18. Some cases have hit home and I've dealt with it in my own stupid way as per usual.
Things have been hard also with regards to my family. My brother took an overdose and was taken to hospital in an ambulance. He didn't do any long lasting damage but I think he may be getting help for his issues. I am the only one in my family that knows. My mum's been put on lithium now for her depression and things have been getting worse for her as well. Being up here, I've realised too much especially being at CYPS because its all becoming to close to home. I want to leave still. I want to come off placement. At the same time, I don't know what I want. I'm so lost within everything, my mind, my world I just don't know what to believe or think.
I was going to try and make a GP appointment, but I haven't had the time to do so and there's not much point as I'm going home for Christmas on the 21st. I feel just so lost in all this chaos that I don't really know where to fit in anymore. Yet again, I leave this post questioning what to do because I really, really don't know what to do anymore..
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